I totally will. Just wait until I've had dinner, and hope I'm not playing GTAIV.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
But I should really be asleep.
I haven't posted in a while because I've been a bit busy. And I don't see myself doing a big one before at least Saturday, so don't get your hopes up.
Oh, also, I feel this picture is missing something. I try not to put unfinished things on here, but I just can't figure out what it needs.
It's a bit of an attempt at the night backdrop in Cave Story.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Really.I wish I could bring to justice the dastardly beer-shaker that caused my socks to get wet. He would meet an agonising end being shaken to death in a giant bottle.
It's a waste of precious, life-enhancing alcohol, damnit.
I think it's Michael Bublé time.
Thursday, December 4, 2008
The bottlecap doesn't lie.
The bottlecap never lies.
I've been getting a whole lot of pressure from friends to make a Facebook page. Don't you people understand that I can't be arsed? It'll just be Myspace all over again! I hate Myspace!
Why can't you just email me those wedding photos? Or call to tell me about that party coming up? I'd be content with a text message! Facebook is not the default medium for communication and I don't need one, damnit.
On a completely related note, I've got the photos from Queenscliff on here now, and there are some I'd like to share with you.
Because I'm nice.
This photo was taken on the blues train. A really old train which goes about two kilomtres in one direction and stops to go back again. The four carriages each have a band or solo artist in there with their gear set up playing some songs. It's a really fun time for the audience, The Bedroom Philosopher (photo on right), didn't have a fun time at all. At first he was enjoying it I think, because the train was stationary (See what I did there). But once it started moving, the microphone kept hitting him in the teeth and lips. But he's a quick and funny guy, so it was all in good humour. Until his guitar amp seemed to die, and only the microphone was left working. The first half of our blues train trip was almost completely comedy-music-less. Poor guy.
Once we got to the other station, we swapped over to George Kamikawa's carriage, and he was a fucking champ. The Bedroom Philosopher didn't play blues, or anything at all for the most part, but George is a blues king. He had his slide guitar out, harmonica, acubra, and a beer in his hand. Any time he went to have a sip of it he had everybody shout 'KAMPAI!'. Awesome guy. I just noticed that his photo is at the wrong angle. .. Fix it yourself.
Saturday night was good, the Audreys were the main evening event. The sun was setting right behind us, and at one point was shining right into the eyes of the people on stage. That would have sucked for them, but it made an interesting photo.
You can see on the right there, Nathasha Someoneorother smoking a keyboard on stage.
That's pretty out there.
Saturday night brought Jackson Jackson, who were a whole bunch of fun. I had a dance because none of my friends were there to see me embarass myself.
Sunday morning was Tripod. They did a few jokes that they'd done the day before in the miniature tent, but the setlist was different at least. They were hilarious, unlike when I've seen them on TV. Sunday afternoon was Josh Pyke, who wasn't on for nearly long enough. And given the immense size of the crowd, I was surprised to see him do a request.
I've left heaps out, but I really don't want to type out a novel, so you get the abriged version.
The drive home on Sunday night was much shorter than the drive there on Friday. And far less eventful. On the way home for example, I didn't nearly get crushed by a truck in a merge lane. Good times. Good, terrifying times.
So, this one is just a buh-log. No pictures. Why? I'm feelings CUHRAYZEE! Also I'm drinking. I'm well on my way, folks. Feelin' good.
So the music festival was completely awesome. Plenty to do and see and hear. Awesome bands, awesome fedoras to buy. Lots of stuff. And things.
Good times were had by all!
I'm tell you stories, but I simply can't remember them well engouh. I'll tell you tomorrow.
Also, I'm wicked full. Too much zuchini slice, too many beers, too many doritos.
This is me right now:
Except I have hair. And a dark blueg dressing gown.
Oh, right. No pictures.
Well, whatever. This is my blawg and I'll do what I like. If you don't like it, tell your friends. They might like it.
Question on inside of bottlecap: Where did kilts originate?
No cheating. Post your answer in the comments section. You will get it wrong.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
My friend Robbie called me today to tell me about a new star constellation just to the right of the Big Dipper. I have no explanation as to why it's a new constellation, because I'm not an astronomer. Robbie seems to know what's happening up there though, and told me where to find it.
I've outlined it for you so you too, can see ... Bacon.
Monday, December 1, 2008
When I was five or six years old, I thought elephants were twenty metres tall, and blue whales 500 metres long. I still think that'd be completely awesome. Somebody in the genetics field get onto that for me, will you?
With that in mind, I present you with a drawing of a potato.
Bit ordinary, huh? A regular old potato. Not growing a magical stalk into the skies, or piloting a burning helicopter as safely as he can to a cliff ledge in the mountains, or giving a physics lecture. Potatoes aren't very exciting people.
EDIT: I already hate that potato and his carefree attitude. I've looked at him for too long.
Friday, November 28, 2008
Get it? Humanity? Blue manatee?
If you haven't heard of this yet, get it now! Run it, then type the word 'delete' and tell me if you can guess what TV show's theme it is. You'll get extra points if your name is Don Smith-Sexington, because goddamn, that's an awesome name.
AAANYwho, I'm heading away for the weekend. Not that it's uncommon for me to go a weekend without posting anything here. Or a week for that matter, but I thought I'd tell you anyway. Expect a nice long post on Monday, with text for a change. Maybe I'll draw you something nice.
Like a potato.
In the meantime, I made this in mspaint.
Click for embiggenment, or I shall be forced to hurt you.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Thursday, November 20, 2008
You know when you're sitting really comfortably, and you don't want to move, lest you lose that awesome comfortableness, but the burger rings are way over there and the coat-hanger just isn't long enough to get them?
That's the problem I have riiiight now.
If you didn't know me, you'd think I was some huge fat guy or something.
Only on the inside, my friends.
Mmmm.. burger rings.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Monday, November 17, 2008
That's the face my thousands of readers are making as another day goes by without pictures and a small amount of uninteresting text alongside them on my blog.. Said readers are so hurt, in fact, that they stop commenting and sending me the love letters I so cherish. One dedicated fan was so upset that he cancelled the parade to be held in my honour through the busiest street in his city. Lord Mayor John So will not be returning.
Seriously though, I once had eighteen people visit here in one day!! Eighteen! Isn't that amazing?
Friday, November 7, 2008
Friday, October 31, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Monday, October 27, 2008
Friday, October 17, 2008
My biggest fear is that my car tyre will explode while I'm filling it up with air. I seriously don't want to do it. If it blows I'll be completely deaf! Maybe my face will be seperated from the rest of my head or something equally unpleasant.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
My good friend Brandon (whose nonexistent blog I have not linked you to) and I have awesome conversations in msn that consist of nothing but drawings. Too bad msn is shit and doesn't save handwritten messages, otherwise I'd have a goldmine of awesome pictures to show you people. As it is though, this collage will suffice. Click for embiggenment.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
I just smashed my knee against my desk. I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY.
I'm posting live from sunny My Room, where the temperature is a steady lovelyº. My breakfast is delicious and I am pantsless.
It's going to be a good day!
So the last month or however long has been pretty damn good. Lots of BBQs, time with friends and making sweet sweet music with Mark. He plays the drums. My good friend Rutherford Jones has started documenting his scientastic adventures. In science. Which I assure you are hilarious.
I've kicked out the old NES, given it a good blow (see 'dusting') and tried to finish Megaman 3. My efforts appear to be wasted though, as that game is goddamn impossible. I got past the first wave of bosses (which I could never do as a lad), but then then are just MORE bosses. And tougher to boot.
So after a few days of Megaman I naturally gave up as I am one to do, and shifted my interest instead to Super Mario Bros. Muscle memory can only get you so far. Still getting stuck where I did nine years ago.
CURSE YOU MIYAMOTO!!!
All this Nintendo-ity has given me the urge to catch some Pokemon. But then I realise just how irritating that game is sometimes.
I'm still on the antique PC, unable to get my Pyro on, which is horribly unfair seeing as Rutherford has finally started playing TF2 and is loving it. This stone-age machine is mind numblingly annoying. It seems to have its own rules of science. Removing the two inactive and unreachable drives only gives it the ability to not turn on anymore, and it still won't accept the fact that there's a damn DVDrom in there.
Today Evan's having a BBQ! It's going to be awesome fun.
That is all.
Hey, speaking of pants, I think mine are dry now.
Is there any better feeling than jeans fresh out of the dryer? If there is I don't wanna know about it.
And how fitting for the end of the post; I just smashed my other knee against the desk.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Melbourne Central is a large shopping, office, and public transport hub in the city of Melbourne. The complex includes the Melbourne Central Shopping Centre, the Melbourne Central railway station, and the 211-metre high office tower with its distinctive black colour and two communications masts.
Contained underneath the shopping centre's massive glass cone sits the Coop's Shot Tower which was built on the site between 1889 and 1890. It ceased to be used in 1960. The tower was retained to become a focal point of the centre.
The addition of the railway station to Melbourne Central was controversial for its lack of regard for the animal inhabitants living directly underneath Central, where the station was planned to be built. Extensive animal rights protests proved fruitless, and the construction went ahead.
Met with minimal underground resistance from the goblins, Melbourne Central's underground railway station was completed successfully in 1981 as part of the City Loop railway line still used to this day. Should you happen across a now homeless goblin on a crowded train, it is customary to offer him your seat.
Design and Purpose
The original design of the shopping centre, office tower, and railway station was by Japanese architect Kisho Kurokawa. The shopping centre's original primary tenant was the first Australian branch of the Daimaru department store, which closed in 2002 after a decade of unprofitable operation. The reason for which is commonly attributed to the large number of goblins having taken refuge within the store, making shoppers uncomfortable.
Every Tuesday at 8:40 PM a warning tone is sounded inside and around Melbourne Central, notifying shoppers, pedestrians and goblins that they have twenty minutes to vacate the building and its immediate surroundings. Although this tone seems to cause more people to gather in, than vacate the immediate area, it is a necessary safety requirement. If anybody happened to be inside of the building at 9:00, they would surely be crushed to death by the internal gears and enormous mechanical parts the building requires to transform into Melbourne's 300-metre tall protector - Mecha Central.
Commissioned in March of 1983 as Minister for Defence Gordon Scholes first act in power, Mecha Central was created for the purpose of defending Melbourne against the regular Tuesday night attacks from the sky by the Anti-Humans and their frighteningly large Deathmechachine.
Mecha Central fought this threat every Tuesday night for almost fifteen years before the Anti-Humans decided to focus their attacks on Adelaide, where the 20-metre tall Churchbots - while numerous - are less of a threat.
Mecha Central is now only activated as a tourist attraction, but takes its job very seriously; surveying and patroling the city skies for its nemesis Deathmechachine until daybreak.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
I've been offered a not-so-delicious (and most probably poisoned) meal upon Evan's demise to give me mastery over all of time and space. While the outcome of devouring said un-goods is tempting, I'm just not that big on cannibalism.
And so, with dear Evan soon out of the picture, my blog can take its rightful place as the seventh most popular blog written by a 1988-born brown-haired male from Melbourne who often wears odd socks and enjoys popping bubble wrap.
Quite the prestigious title.
I will use my newfound power and influence over the masses to have a statue built in Evan's honour;
A stunning bronze twelve-kilometre tall recreation of an amazing man, with a contemplative, youthful yet wizened look on his magnificent face. A book in one hand and a whiskey held aloft in the other. People will marvel at this powerful sculpture for centuries to come, and remember the depicted for the witty, admirable stallion he was. Visible by the naked eye from as far as the Sea of Serenity, it will be the single greatest structure on the face of the Earth.
I hope they get my eyes right.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Clearly, Evan is under the impression that if he writes something on his blawg, I have to write something of equal or greater length on mine. Like his is only some form of payment to get me to update mine. Well guess what? I can't be bothered writing that much! I'm busy eating my sammich, and drinking my orange juice.
I could have a whine about a certain sister of mine - who will remain nameless - that decided it would be a fantastic idea to put on some awful, awful music at an ear-destroying volume to wake me up. Having only had four hours sleep, you could say I'm rather displeased.
But I won't, because that wouldn't achieve anything. Perhaps relieving her of the ability to use her legs would though.
The possibility of Evan complaining further about my lack of a long update won't stop me from leaving it there.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Very eventful indeed! Lots to say. Nothing I particularly want to talk about on the internet, however.
You'll just have to make do with the following, less interesting, paragraph.
Which I wrote and promptly deleted, because it was too boring.
Aaaand now I can't think of anything to write.
Nuts to you people, I'm off to watch old Simpsons episodes!
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Well, digital painting.
I took a photo of my friend Evan - whose blog I should stop linking you to since he never updates it - about two years ago, I think. Maybe longer? Not too sure.
What I am sure of is that the photo reminds me of the end of the fantastic night of drinking and fun at a friend's house that came directly before it. Everybody but us had gone to bed hours before, and we sat outside watching the fire and the sunrise, enjoying a drink. Or two.
Having sixty or so drinks in me, I managed to miss the actual sunrise. But as soon as this was realised, I ran for the camera and began diving around Evan taking photos. Two of which (and only two) turned out magnificently. This - my first attempt at a proper painting - is a recreation of one of said photos which is pinned on my wall.
It's just over there.
You probably can't see it from that angle.
Monday, September 1, 2008
My friend Andrew brought something to my attention a few minutes ago; more than six people read my blog.
577 daily pageviews? Even if it's one person sitting there refreshing 576 times a day, that's still pretty impressive for something I don't update daily. Maybe I should start eh?
And with this update you'll of course need a drawing.
In truth, I did just remove it from an unfinished doodlewall, so you'll probably see it again some time down the road, because I'm lazy.
But you get what you pay for, and you're not paying me.
This blawg seems to have become nothing more than a personal drawing uploadey place recently, so I should bring it back down to the land of blogging for a while.
I bought some wicked 5.1 speakers, but they pop every so often and aren't surroundey. There's something up with this supposedly 5.1 sound card.
CURSE YOU TECHNOLOGY!
But away and into the realm of non-electric sound, I had my guitar taken in for surgery last week, and he's been picked up from the hospital today sounding better than ever. There's an addition too, it now has a peg on the neck-side so I can use a strap and be a mobile-guitarist. None of this sitting down nonsense anymore.
Evan, who of course you know, has introduced me to the wonders of an anime called 'Gurren Lagann'. Or 'Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann', I'm not quite sure which one. It's about a future society of humans who live (or lived) underground in tribes, of sorts, and their battles with giant robots piloted by Beastmen. Sounds ridiculous, but hear me out though because it's pretty good. After only eight episodes (all viewed yesterday) I found myself devastated at the loss of a particular character. Which goes to show that my goal of becoming an emotionless husk of a being is not progressing with much haste. I plan to go watch more episodes as soon as I post this.
Which is now.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Man, I really want fish and chips right now.
Curse you, 5:22 AM!
There's nobody else in the house until Sunday afternoon! Somebody come over! The only company I have right now is the dog, and she doesn't make for very thrilling conversation.
All she wants to talk about is food or barking at birds, you see.
5:30 ish is as good a time as any. Time to go to bed!
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Everyone's favourite assassin; HK-47.
Not much to say today. I've been a bit of a hermit recently.
Do hermit crabs freak anybody else out? They just look .. creepy.
Just finished this one, didn't think it warranted a second post in one day.
Friday, August 15, 2008
Thursday, August 14, 2008
A wall of doodles.
My favourite parts are the man pointing a gun at a waffle, the guy telling a sock-puppet to take his hand, and Iron Man passed out over a foot-stool. It turned out well, so I may do a few more some time.
I'd like to share with you part of a conversation I had a few hours ago. It goes a-something like this:
Name withheld says:
scott i wish to impart some wisdom to you
Name withheld says:
when bored and tired, but unfailingly awake at 1:44am. do not become curious and punch yourself in the face
Name withheld says:
it hurts more than you would expect
Name withheld says:
it's cold and my right hand is numb. thought i'd give it a go
There's a very fine line between genius and insanity.
I like to think this particular friend of mine has built a small hut on that fine line, where he lives as a hermit. Of course, this friend is sane enough to know he doesn't want his auto-face-punching-escapades known to all our friends, and has asked that I withhold his name. A few of you probably know who it is without me having to say anything at all.
Perhaps his genius lies in giving anything a go once for the experience and a story to tell. Even if it involves pain. Or maybe that's the craziness. I'm no psycho-analyst.
Sure doesn't stop me from pretending to be one, however.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
I've been working on this comic/piece of art today, and I'm pretty proud of it! Shame you can't really put detail into a pink ball though. Click for embiggenment.
So I understand now what Ruby's is to people who don't drink, and why they're not so enthusiastic about going. I drove tonight, having consumed a preposterous amount of beer last night and not wanting to drink again the night directly afterwards.
Speaking of last night, it was wicked fun. So many friendly randoms! Such cheap beer! Such a nice chef! It was a really good night, and needs to be done again next monday. Although, I lost two meatballs from my meatball sub to gravity. I guess the ground just wanted them more.
Monday, August 11, 2008
Those new pants I bought last week? I just had a quick look at them and yes - they're still pants.
So I was actually drawing this picture last night, and I got the head and hair done when the computer decided it was time for a quick nap. I hate the feeling when that happens and you realise you completely forgot to save what you were doing. But it's okay because I think this one turned out a lot better anyway.
It snowed yesterday morning! This is by my count the second time this has happened at our house. Ever. I'd tell you about how incredible it looked, but I only saw it for about two seconds out of my window. The reason being that I didn't care and just wanted to go back to sleep. In my defense; sleeping is an important part of staying awake, and I need a good 22 hours of sleep a day. If I don't get that, I may not have the strength for my midday nap!
Apart from the snow, the weather has been disgusting up here recently. It rained all night last night (I know because I couldn't sleep until about 6. One too many cups of tea before bed) and it's been raining all day today. Thankfully it hasn't been too horrible while I'm working, because most people's houses around this area are surrounded by mud as it is.
So I'm awaiting the arrival of Evan, who's coming over to play guitars and maybe a bit of Bookworm Adventures with me. Don't look at that game and think it's for kids, because it's wicked fun.
Well, it is for kids, but it's also for cool people like Evan and I and Jerry Holkins.
When we get bored of all that it's time to head to Boyd's house, pick up the other guys and off to the bar, whereupon we will consume an extraordinary amount of potent potables for an amazingly small cost.
My definition of 'small cost' may change tomorrow morning.
Monday, August 4, 2008
Sunday, August 3, 2008
The past couple of days can be accurately summarised by a picture of a walrus in a beer hat.
Tonight while working, I had a possum follow me to a customer's door. He was staring quite intently at the glorious foodstuffs within the bag from his vantage point on a branch not 50cm from my head. No doubt infuriated that he wasn't invited to feast upon said goods, he set off to stop me returning to my car by blocking the stairs behind me. I applauded his vigour and walked around him. I doubt lasagna is good for possums anyway. What do they eat, bugs or something? And fruit I suppose.
The owner of the house told me he saw some drunk kids at the station feeding a possum salt and vinegar chips, with some Jim Beam to wash it down. The possum went on to simply hang upside down for twenty minutes or so.
So I got the full version of the Spore Creature Creator, but this computer I've borrowed from Dad has no video card. And for some reason, some stupid reason that I can't seem to fix, it has no sound either. But I suppose those would only really be problems if the computer HAD A DAMN CD DRIVE! AAARRGHH!!! It fills me with a horrible rage! No music and no vidjagames. I'm dying here people! I'm taking donations in the form of a new computer. I'm looking at you, Jordan.
Friday, July 25, 2008
Poor simple Mike; he doesn't get it. Allow me to explain it for you!
The stick figure man has just told himself in the mirror "My, what magnificent lips you have!".
It could be that Mike isn't stupid, and has simply never read Little Red Riding Hood.
...But I'm just going to assume that he's drunk.
Speaking of Mikeypoo, we went out for a drink on Tuesday night. It was heaps of fun, our friends and I bought some cards and played Blackjack! We forgot a large amount of game mechanics, but I'll attribute that to the drinking. A good night indeed.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Ohh fatty, will you ever learn?
In his defense, he is glued to the floor with liquid nails, so he can't get much exercise.
Speaking of which, I just remembered that I stopped doing that. My bad.
"So Scott," you may ask, "what's with the lack of updates recently?"
In answer to your question that I asked, the updates went through the wash in the pocket of my jeans, and were subsequently lost. I blame Evan mostly, because he's not here to defend himself. Even if he were here, I doubt he'd do anything more than say something like "Tschhhh...".
Updates have been a bit slow because I've been a bit busy. A sound excuse. Also I'm using this other computer that Dad lent me, and it's not particularly fun to use. Which has its benefits I suppose - spending less time on the computer is a good thing.
But I do miss Team Fortress 2.
So I was just on the phone, during which time I discovered that my mobile can only sustain about ten minutes of battery power while in a call. This doesn't seem like good news.
I doubt you can still buy new batteries for 3315s these days, that model being like seven years old or something. I'm hoping they're available somewhere, because I don't want to upgrade, I like that 3315. Although it only holds around 23 messages. That's not fantastic. But the thing's built like a fucking brick - they're indestructable! And no that is not a challenge. Do not steal my phone and throw it at a wall while I'm distracted.
Kung Fu Panda is very funny. Go see it. Now.
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Look at this. And I mean really look at it.
This - my friends - is fucking fantastic.
Brandon is fucking fantastic.
I love it.
Thank you Brandonius.
Employment! I'm getting there folks. Large amount of work coming from Dad right now, and there are some job-jobs on the table. One of them happens to be about two hours' commute away though. The other one is nowhere near as far, but not as serious or long lasting. It's quite a pickle indeed. There's the serious far away job that seems to be the beginning of a career of sorts, and the work-in-a-shop job that is outstandingly closer and not such a big decision. If you could add polls to blawg posts I'd let you three readers decide for me.
My cousin came over last night to play guitars, drink, eat nachos and watch Arrested Development. It was awesome fun! Lots of Foo Fighters and John Butler. He and I were born 17 days apart, so we've decided that next March we'll have one big family dinner for our 21st birthdays instead of two. The plan is that in doing this, we will have somewhat minimalised embarrassing stories from parents. The focus being on both of us rather than just the one. Unfortunately the more I think about it the less sense it makes. I did have a bit of beer in me when I came up with this plan. My main concern is that we'd need some sort of novelty oversized table. Ridiculously big. Impractically large.
You may remember that last week I said my computer died, and that my car may turn into a Bugatti. I was quite wrong. The next time I drove somewhere, my seat broke. The slider snapped off the part of the car it was connected to, so it rocks back and forth now. At least it takes the edge off the horrible suspension, so it's not all bad. But it still proves that my theory was wrong - it seems that all my possessions are doomed to break and die horrible deaths.
Perhaps I shouldn't have nice things, just for that reason.
Saturday, June 28, 2008
So I think the last post I made was ages ago. A few weeks or something. I'm lazy like that, but here you are reading it anyway, so I've not been punished for my lack of updates.
My computer seems to have died on me. A bit of hard drive failure. I say a bit, but you know it's dead when Spinrite won't even help. And Spinrite always helps. So today's picture was drawn in paint because I'm on my sister's computer.
AARrrrghh. If there isn't a problem with my car, there's a problem with my computer. Speaking of my car, it's running better than ever. Maybe it's a see-saw situation - if I destroy my computer completely my car will turn into a Bugatti.
So I suppose one or two of you out of the three that read this have been wondering what I've been up to. Since telling you what I've been doing is what blogs are for. They weren't really created for whining, but 5 million emos might disagree.
There's been a lot of job applying and very little money earning, time spent with friends, time drinking, time regretting time drinking, and more job applying. I'm on a cycle of those things.
I think I'm actually starting to learn my way around the city now, thanks to all the time spent there recently. It's not as confusing as I once thought it was, but it's still just as expensive as I remember. As the knowledge of the city layout expands, so does my hatred for trains. How can it be that they smell worse exponentially? And the other passengers seem to be drunker and drunker. Some drunk girl on Wednesday had her ass cheeks up against the window while standing on the seat, mooning some guy who just got off the train. While hilarious, it's not the kind of thing one enjoys so close to their head.
Yesterday on the way home from a mate's I was lucky enough to get on the V-line. No drunk smelly people there, oh no. Huge comfortable seats. Clean too! And I could swear it was faster. That luck soon ran out when I had to get onto the Belgrave line though. Something like three trains before the one I was going to board had been cancelled, and the platform was more packed than I'd ever seen one. I held witness to the fastest seat-grabbing in history when the doors opened. It was like life or death musical chairs, standing being the death of your leg muscles. Also there was no music. I was somehow swept to the front of the justling and into a seat, I still don't know how. There was hardly room to breath in there. A guy was removed from the train because the doors tried to close on him. He was bald. And then angry.
On an unrelated note, I need somebody to make me a painting. A painting of Chuck Norris punching a lion in the face with it in a headlock, while holding a live grenade in his teeth. The background has to be made of nothing but fire, scorpions and sharks.
WHAT AM I DOING? I could be downloading last week's episode of Doctor Who!!
Alright, you can stop panicking. It's downloading now.
So I think that's all I can really bring myself to type right now, I'm being distracted by the smooth crooning voice of Michael Bublè. He's totally wicked.